It Finally Happened
by AmazingBethan
Summary: It's about time! Dan and Phil (aka: danisnotonfire and AmazingPhil) have been friends for a long time. It takes a spike of jealousy for them to finally realise that they are meant to be together. A Phanfic for those fans of Phan and Dan and Phil. If you're as obsessed as I am about Phan, then you might like this FanFic.
1. Chapter one

**It finally happened**

Chapter one: Texts, dreams and jealousy

"Another awesome show tonight guys!" Mike said.  
Phil grinned, "Thanks Mike! See you next Sunday." Dan and Phil walked out of the big building that contained BBC Radio One. "I'm never going to get used to this," Dan suddenly said.  
Phil frowned, "Used to what?"  
"Having a show on Radio One!" Dan spoke like it was the greatest thing in the world.  
"It is pretty awesome," Phil agreed. Dan smiled at his best friend and said, "So, do you want to catch a movie?"  
"Sure," Phil shrugged. They walked down to the nearest cinema and looked at the film schedule outside. "Pacific Rim is on in ten," Dan said, "Do you want to see that?"  
"Yeah sure, I've wanted to see that for ages." They bought tickets and settled themselves in the correct screening room. "Not many people here." Dan commented.  
"No there isn't is there?" Phil frowned.  
"Well I suppose it's been at the cinema for nearly three weeks now." Dan offered. Phil nodded as he took a sip of his drink.

A few days later when they were eating cereal in the lounge, Dan asked, "Uh Phil? When did you put these Pokémon stickers on the table?" He tried peeling them off but they were stuck. Phil grinned guiltily. "The table looks prettier like that!" He said.  
"Seriously," Dan moaned, "It's like living with a five year old!" Phil smiled to himself; He liked it when Dan overreacted. Dan shook his head. It _was_ like living with a five year old but that's what Dan liked about Phil. The fact that Dan, being twenty-two, could act more mature than Phil at times gave him a feeling of power. But of course he knew that he was immature in his own way. So he couldn't really talk.

They finished their cereal and Phil took the empty bowls into the kitchen. He had left his phone on the table and a notification suddenly sounded. Without thinking, Dan looked at Phil's phone. He had a habit of being a bit too nosey. The text was from 'Becca'. Dan didn't know who that was and Phil had never mentioned the mystery girl. He read the text and was even more confused. It said:  
"Hey babe, had a great time last night! Same time again tonight? Xxxxxxx"  
Dan was still staring at the screen when Phil came back. "Dan? What's wrong?"  
"Uh… Who's 'Becca'?" Dan looked at him.  
"Have you been looking at my phone again? I told you to stop doing that!" Phil was clearly annoyed. Dan felt guilty but he wanted to know who Becca was and he was interested in the fact that she had "had a great time last night".  
"Who is she?" He pressed on.  
Phil sighed and grabbed his phone out of Dan's hand. "Just… A girl," He stuttered.  
"Really?" Dan answered sarcastically, "I didn't know that Becca could be a girl!"  
"Shut up Dam," Phil groaned as he sat on the edge of the sofa.  
"Sorry," Dan apologised, "Just tell me who she is."  
Instead of giving in, Phil shocked Dan by saying, "I don't see why this is any of your business."  
"No need to be rude!" Dan answered back, "It kinda is my business since you're my best friend."  
Phil looked down. He knew he was going to have to tell Dan sooner or later. "She's just this girl I've been seeing."  
"Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!" Dan burst out, "My buddy has a girlfriend?! Why didn't you tell me?"  
Phil looked uncomfortable. "She's not my girlfriend."  
Dan sat up straighter. "Still! I thought we told each other everything…" He was annoyed and hurt that Phil had kept this form him.  
"I'm sorry," Phil wouldn't look up. He looked at the text which he hadn't read yet. Before he replied to it Dan said, "Are you meeting her again tonight?" He was quieter and strangely angry. He didn't understand why.  
"Not if you don't want me to," Phil replied.  
Dan took a long breath in. "Of course I want you to go," He said, "I'm just annoyed you didn't tell me." He looked at Phil as he said this. Phil was already texting back Becca. "I'm sorry," He breathed again. After putting his phone in his back pocket, he went silently into his room.  
Dan put his head in his hands. He didn't know why this bothered him so much. Surely he should be happy that Phil had found a girl. He should have been but he wasn't.

For the rest of the day the boys didn't talk much. Phil spent most of it avoiding Dan and any eye contact. Dan was fine with that. He didn't want to talk to Phil any more than Phil wanted to talk to him. He was still angry but not as much as before. Most of the anger had been replaced with sadness. He wasn't sure why. His brain was telling him nothing.  
At about half six, Phil came into the lounge wearing his favourite black jeans and a dark blue shirt. He was putting on his jacket as Dan glanced over to him. "I guess you're going out then… Again," Dan muttered.  
"I told you, I don't have to go if you don't want me to."  
Dan tutted, annoyed. Phil wasn't making him feel any better. "Just go," He whispered. Phil looked down and sadly went out of the room.

When he heard the front door slam shut Dan curled up into a ball. What was this feeling? Angry and sad at the same time. He felt close to tears. A cup of tea would help, right? He sat up again and tried to recollect himself.  
Going into the kitchen, he noticed the clock. "_Maybe I should have something to eat," _He thought. He looked around the kitchen and decided he didn't want anything. He felt tired and sick.

When the tea had brewed and his pyjamas were on, Dan crawled into bed. Seven o'clock wasn't his usual bedtime but he was exhausted. His mind went back to his and Phil's conversation that morning. And then something went ding. Dan sat up; He knew what was wrong with him. He was jealous. Jealous of what though?

In the middle of London, Phil was in the middle of a meal with Becca. His head wasn't really in it that night though and Becca knew it. "Are you ok Phil? You seem… distant," She frowned. Phil, snapping back into reality, said, "I'm… I'm fine. I'm just upset how I left things with Dan earlier."  
Becca looked sympathetic, "Don't worry honey. I'm sure he's fine."  
"It's just weird," Phil continued, "Why did he react like that? He seemed really sad."  
"Well to me it sounds like Dan is jealous," Becca smiled as she said this.  
"Dan... jealous? I don't think so," Phil put down his fork.  
"_I_ think so," She replied, "Think about it. He was annoyed when he found out about me. He's upset that you have me and he doesn't have anyone."  
"You really think that's what it's about?" Phil still wasn't too sure.  
"I'm positive. When you get back tonight why don't you talk to him? It might help clear up the air."  
Phil pondered this idea and went back to his food.

Dan had been jealous before. He usually got jealous really easily. But this time it felt different. It was stronger and hurt more. Was he jealous that Phil had a near girlfriend and he didn't? That seemed the only logical explanation. Without warning, his mind gave up on him and he fell asleep.

It was getting late and Phil was getting more and more agitated. He hadn't been very good company that evening. Becca knew that he had a lot on his mind to let it go. She gave him a kiss on the cheek and said, "If he is jealous, remember to be sympathetic. I'll text you tomorrow."  
Phil just nodded and they went their separate ways. The whole way home Phil went through in his head what he was going to say. He still didn't know how to bring it up without it being awkward. He took a deep breath and then turned his key in the lock and opened the door.

Dan was sitting on the sofa watching TV. Phil came in and sat next to him. "I'm sorry Dan," He said, "I'm not going to see her again."  
Dan smiled and hugged him. During the hug Phil suddenly kissed him Dan on the forehead. "I want you instead," Phil whispered. They pulled apart but kept close. Dan looked into Phil's fabulously blue eyes and lent in. Phil draped an arm around his waist and didn't waste any time. Their lips touched and-

Dan shot straight up in his bed. That did not just happen. He did not just have that dream. He heard the front door slam shut. That would be Phil, shit! He couldn't talk to him, not after having that weird dream.

"Dan?!" Phil called out, "I need to talk to you." Fuck! Looks like he couldn't avoid this confrontation. He heard a light tap on his door. He gulped, turned on his light and cautiously walked to the bedroom door. He opened it to see Phil who immediately looked at his feet. He looked nervous and awkward. Dan went back to his bed. He didn't want to just stand there, an awkward silence hanging in the air. When he sat on the bed he hugged his legs. After a moment, Phil decided to follow him into the room. "I want to talk to you about earlier," He was looking anywhere but where Dan was. "Don't bother," Dan sighed. Even though it was obvious he didn't want to, Phil continued, "I um… I talked to Becca about it and she seems to think that you're… jealous…"

Phil looked at him when he said this. Which meant that it was Dan's turn to look away.  
"Look, if you are, that's fine. Don't worry. You're only twenty-two. You'll find a girl soon."  
Hearing this made Dan angry. He realised that he didn't want a girl; He wanted Phil. Over the years he had subconsciously developed deeper and deeper feelings for Phil. He couldn't say that though. That would make the atmosphere even more unbearable. He just nodded to avoid any conflict. He thought that would be it but Phil surprised him by leaning down suddenly and hugging him. Dan closed his eyes, he was enjoying the moment. But it was over too soon. Phil pulled back which pushed Dan over the edge, "I don't want you to see her anymore."  
Phil stepped back a bit. "What?"  
Dan had really dug himself in it now. He opened his mouth to say something but nothing came to mind.  
"You don't want me to see her anymore?" Phil frowned. Dan didn't say anything.  
"Is it just that you're jealous that I'm seeing someone? Or do you just not want to see me happy?!" An edge of anger finished the last sentence. Phil was getting annoyed now.  
"No! That's not it!" Dan counteracted.  
"Then what is it?!" Phil folded his arms, "It's not like I flaunt her around the flat and brag about her!"  
"I know! I didn't mean it like that!"  
"Then how did you mean it?!"  
Serious Phil was quite rare so when angry Phil was out, you sorta brought it on yourself.  
Dan couldn't say it. It would ruin their friendship. He had to say something though. Phil wasn't going to forget this any time soon. "I… Uh…" Nothing came to mind.  
Phil was glaring at him now which had never happened before. Dan had never seen him this angry since well, ever. "Seriously Dan!" Phil exploded as he couldn't wait any longer, "I don't understand! Why this is bothering you so much?!" "Because…" Dan started but he couldn't continue. He now realised that he'd had feelings for Phil for a long time.  
"Just tell me!" Phil was getting more and more impatient. This wasn't the sort of conversation he's originally wanted at ten o'clock at night.  
"I-I…" Dan stuttered. Phil urged him on with his eyes.  
"I… think I'm in love with you." Dan closed his eyes.  
Phil blinked. He opened his mouth to say something but slowly shut it again. A silence hung in the air. Neither of them said anything for a while until Dan whispered, "I uh… I'd like to go to sleep now if you don't mind." He just wanted to be alone so he could cry. Tears pricked in his eyes when Phil nodded and slowly walked out of the room, shutting the door behind him.


	2. Chapter two

Chapter two: Anger, sunshine and open doors

That was not what Phil had expected. Nowhere close. A million things were going through his head. Every time he sat down he had to get up again. He ended up just pacing around the room. He was angry at himself for not saying anything. "Dammit Phil!" He thought out loud, "You're an idiot!" He wasn't one for scolding himself but he never shied away from an opportunity to do so.

While Phil was having a go at himself, Dan was beating himself up too. "Why?!" He violently whispered, "Why did I have to say that?!" He was now out of his bed and was lying on the floor. He sighed. His life was over. Phil probably hated him now. He would move out and leave him on his own. How would he explain it to the fans? That Phil just happened to "pop out" every time Dan made a video?  
He got up, that was enough wallowing. He had to talk to Phil. Even though he didn't want to, he had to.

Phil checked the clock. It was nearly midnight. He was tired but he had promised himself that he wouldn't go to bed until he'd talked to Dan. He didn't know what to say though. He'd been in his room for nearly two hours and he still had no idea what to say. He started thinking of Dan. The fact that Dan may have played a trick on him crossed Phil's mind for a second. He shook the thought out. Why would he joke about something like that? He had been perfectly serious when he had said it. Phil then started thinking back to the argument they had been having before Dan let slip his true feelings. That made him feel worse. He had been so mean and that was a sensitive topic. No wonder Dan hadn't wanted to tell him. And then it sank in. Dan liked him. Dan liked him a _lot_. Dan liked him so much that he thought that he was in love with him. He couldn't be though… right? But he was.  
A lot of things were going through Phil's head. He sat on the edge of the bed, trying to make sense of it all.  
"My best friend is in love with me," He finally whispered out loud. Why was that so hard for him to comprehend? He didn't know what to say or what to do. He decided that it was finally time for him to talk to Dan. They needed to sort this out. For the life of him, he didn't know how though. Hopefully something would come to him when he saw Dan's face.

Phil silently shut his door behind him and looked over to Dan's door. What if he was asleep? He would wake him. He needed to talk to him though. After a minute of debating with himself outside of Dan's door, he held up his knuckle to knock. Before he could do so though, the door swung open. His eyes widened as he saw Dan who was equally surprised. He had just been coming to see Phil. "I uh…" He mumbled, trying to think of something fast. Phil was staring into the twenty-two year olds eyes. He hadn't noticed what a brilliant shade of brown they were before. He lowered his hand and stepped towards Dan. Dan didn't know what to say. He knew this was going to be an awkward conversation; more awkward than the last one.  
Phil only had one thought and one action he wanted to do. Dan had opened his mouth to say something and didn't realise what Phil was doing until his lips touched his. They both closed their eyes. The kiss was short and sweet. And most importantly, it felt right. It felt like they should have been doing it all along.

Phil pulled back and looked at Dan who still had his eyes closed. "Feel better now?" Phil said sheepishly.  
Dan didn't know what to say. He had never been so short of words in one evening before. "Yes…" He whispered quietly. Phil smiled at his feet. The silence that followed contained no awkwardness at all. Phil had just held his head back up when Dan's mouth came down on his this time. He was surprised at first but soon closed his eyes and enjoyed the kiss. This one was longer than the first and both were grateful because of it. Dan pulled Phil into his bedroom and closed the door behind them.

The sun streaked in behind the half closed curtains. The light woke up Dan who had been asleep in his bed. He blinked a few times while his eyes adjusted to the light. Looking around his room, he noticed Phil who was sleeping silently next to him. He smiled to himself and leaned over and kissed Phil on the cheek. While waiting for him to wake up, Dan went into the bathroom.  
A few minutes after Dan had left, Phil's eyes fluttered open. He rubbed them and tried to remember where he was. He looked around and realised that he was in Dan's room. He suddenly recalled the previous day's events. He couldn't stop himself from grinning. He looked down at himself as he sat up. He was still in his clothes from the evening before. His shirt was a bit creased though.

Dan splashed water onto his face. He was so tired. After Phil came into his room, they had made out for a bit but stopped when Phil said they needed to talk it out before they did anything rash. They had ended up talking for three hours before both falling asleep, exhausted. They had come to the conclusion that they were now together but weren't telling anyone. They didn't want the fans or their parents finding out by accident. They wanted to tell everyone themselves. But not yet, not until they were both ready.

Dan wondered back into his room to find that Phil was now sitting on the edge of the bed. "Hey…" He smiled as Dan came and sat next to him. Dan had a hard time trying not to laugh out loud because he was so happy. They looked at each other.  
"So…" Dan said, "Last night kind of passed in a blur."  
"It did a bit, didn't it?" Phil laughed. They went back to silence until Phil said, "Is this going to work?"  
Dan frowned, "Is what going to work?"  
"Us… Being together," Phil blushed.  
"Hopefully," Dan said thoughtfully. "I'll make it work," He added, grinning. He pulled Phil into a hug and held him there, stroking his hair.  
Phil closed his eyes. It felt like he belonged there, in Dan's arms. 


	3. Chapter three

Chapter three: Tears, Starbucks and hugs

"Dan!" Phil called.  
"Yeah?" Dan yelled back. He was in his room, shoving on a top. Phil didn't reply so Dan went and looked for him. Phil had gone to get redressed out of his slept-in clothes. His door was open and it was obvious that he wasn't in there. Confused, Dan wondered into the lounge.  
Phil was sitting on the sofa, his head in his hands.  
"What's up?" Dan frowned.  
"I just got a text from Becca," Phil looked up. Dan's face dropped, "Oh…"  
Phil glanced over to his phone which was on the arm of the sofa. Dan took the hint and picked it up. The text from Becca read as follows:  
"Hey babe! I hope you managed to talk to Dan ok last night. Anyway, my friend wanted to meet you. I feel weird texting this but would you say we're a couple? I think we are, I mean, we've been meeting up for a while now. I think that means we're together. I don't want to scare you off though. Will you be ok meeting my friend? I hope so. See ya honey Xxxxxxx"  
Dan didn't say anything until he mumbled, "Shit."  
"My thoughts exactly," Phil agreed.  
Dan handed Phil back his phone and said, "Well… What are you going to do?"  
Phil stood up and started pacing. "I don't know! She said that we're together now so does that mean… Does that mean I'm cheating on her?!" Dan stopped Phil mid-stride by pulling him into a hug. "I don't know," He said soothingly, "Just calm down, we'll work something out."  
Phil took a deep breath and then pulled away from Dan's embrace. "What do I say? I don't think I should tell her this by text… What so I tell her?!"  
Dan had never seen Phil this helpless before. "Well," He began, "Text her back saying that perhaps meeting her friend wouldn't be such a good idea and ask to meet her somewhere. Say you have to talk to her."  
Phil bit his lip. He wasn't too sure about this but there wasn't any other way around it.  
He nodded and started the text:  
"Hey Becca. I don't know how to say this but I don't think meeting your friend would be a good idea. Could I meet you today? I need to talk to you."  
He felt guilty but he had no other choice. He sent it and put his head in his hands again. Dan sat next to him and put his arm around him. "Don't worry Phil," He said, "It'll all be fine."  
"But I've practically cheated on her!" Phil whined. Dan thought fast, "I don't think you have."  
Phil looked up.  
"I mean… It's not like we slept together or anything…"  
Phil's face twisted with worry.  
"Plus," Dan quickly added, "You didn't know that she thought you guys were a couple. As far as you knew, you were a free agent."  
Phil thought about that. That was technically true, right? He felt a bit better but his face dropped when his phone notification went off. Dan took the phone out of Phil's hand before he could see it. The text from Becca read:  
"That's fine. I'm not forcing you into anything. Yeah sure, I'll meet you at Starbucks in an hour? Xxxxx"  
There were less kisses. Dan took note of that.  
"What does it say?" Phil bit his lip again. Dan read out the text and added, "See, its fine."  
Phil frowned, "Fine… Until I tell her. What do I say?!" This was where Dan wasn't too sure. He thought for a moment while Phil stared at him, his eyes pining. "Are you going to tell her about us…. Or are you just going to end things with her?"  
Phil hadn't thought about this. "Do you think I should tell her?" He asked.  
"Well," Dan started, "It depends if you want to tell her the truth of why you're ending it."  
Phil sighed. "I suppose I should."  
Dan nodded. "It might make things a little easier." He put his arm around Phil again protectively. Phil lent his head on Dan's chest. He wasn't looking forward to this.

"Phil!" Becca waved him over. He walked to where she was sitting and sat across from her. "I was just about to order something. Do you want anything?"  
He avoided her eye contact. "No thanks," He replied, "I don't plan on staying too long."  
She frowned but then smiled again. How could he break this to her? She was so sweet and lovely.  
"Oh ok, I'll be right back," She grinned. Phil took a deep breath and tried to remember what Dan had told him: "Tell her the truth. Be honest and sensitive to her feelings." This wasn't going to be easy. Becca sat back down while she waited for her coffee. "So what's up?" She smiled. She had no idea what was coming. Phil looked at her then. "I uh…" He began. She egged him on with her emerald green eyes. "I can't see you anymore." The smile slowly vanished from her face. "What?" She asked, "Why not?"  
"Look," Phil began, "It's not because I don't like you. You're great! It's just…"  
"What is it? Did I scare you off with the whole 'we're a couple now' thing?" She looked as if she were about to cry. This made Phil feel even worse. "No, it's not! I've… I've fallen for someone else. It just came out of nowhere. I'm sorry."  
The poor girl had only thought that they were meeting up for coffee and a chat. She hadn't expected this. Tears brimmed in her eyes. "But _I've_ fallen for _you_!" She sniffed. Phil felt like crying now. "Maybe if I'd meet you first things would have been different but… I didn't so they aren't."  
Becca wiped away a single tear that had made its way down to her nose.  
"Please don't cry!" Phil rubbed his own eyes.  
"I'm sorry," She dabbed her eyes with a napkin. After taking a deep breath she said, "I don't want this to come out wrong but did you… Did you cheat on me?" This was the one question Phil had been dreading. He looked away from her gaze. "What would you put under cheating?"  
She knew that that was a bad sign. "Um… Sleeping with them? Kissing them? That sort of stuff."  
Phil closed his eyes, "We kissed." He didn't want to open his eyes but he knew he had to. Becca was full on crying now. Although, not making a noise apart from the occasional sniffing. "But-" Phil counteracted, "To be fair, I didn't know that we were a couple! I didn't know that!"  
Becca nodded. "It's ok," She whispered between sniffles, "It wouldn't be the first time."  
Dammit! She had been cheated on before. Way to restore her faith in men, Phil!  
"If I had known, I wouldn't have even thought about it!"  
She understood. Her coffee order was called out then. She didn't move.  
"I'll get it for you," Phil got up and went to retrieve the Latte. Becca blew her nose on a second napkin. Phil came back and handed her the coffee. "Careful," He warned, "It's hot."  
She nodded and took a sip. She had stopped crying and her eyes and nose were red.  
"You… cheated on me…" She looked away. Phil bit his lip, he couldn't think of anything else to say.  
"I know you didn't mean to and you didn't realise that you were… But you still did."  
Phil hung his head in shame. "I know," He whispered. Becca just shook her head. Her chair moved. Phil looked up to see Becca was putting on her coat.  
"Don't go," Phil murmured.  
"There's no reason for me to stay anymore," She replied. Phil knew she was right so stayed silent. She picked up her bag and her Latte. Before she left she said, "I can't believe you did this to me. I thought you were a nice guy…" That hit Phil hard. She walked out of the door without a backward glance.

"_I hope he's ok_," Dan thought as he uploaded his most recent video. While he waited he went to get some lunch. It was half twelve and he was hungry. Phil had been gone for nearly an hour. Dan was getting worried but knew that Phil was strong. He had gotten everything out to make a sandwich when he heard the front door shut.  
"Phil? Is that you?!" He called. There was no reply and he heard another door shut. "Phil?!" Dan left his sandwich to look for Phil. He knocked on his door. "Phil?" He whispered through the door. "Are you ok?" Again, there was no answer. Giving up on waiting for Phil to say something, Dan opened the door and cautiously peeked in the room. Phil was lying, face down, on his bed. "Phil?" Dan opened the door a little wider. Phil was silent. Dan shuffled towards the bed and soon realised that Phil was crying. "Phil?!" Dan was really worried now. He sat on the edge of Phil's bed and touched his shoulder carefully.  
"I'm a horrible person!" Dan heard Phil's muffled voice through the pillow.  
"What?" Dan asked. Phil turned his head so Dan could see him. Tears were streaking down his face. Dan wiped away a couple of them.  
"What happened?" He said. Phil told him everything and when he said the last thing Becca had said, his eyes welled with tears again. When Phil had finished, Dan pulled him up into a hug. "Oh Phil!"  
Phil was crying again.  
"It'll all be fine. You don't have to see her again," Dan said soothingly.  
"She's right though!" Phil pressed on, "I'm a terrible person!"  
"Shhh Phil! You're not! You're amazing!"  
Phil looked up at him, his face worried. He opened his mouth to say something but Dan carried on, "Just forget about her. You have me now."  
Phil nodded as Dan wiped away any remaining tears from his face. They stayed wrapped in each other's arms for a few minutes; Dan occasionally leaning down to kiss Phil on the head. "Are you ok now?" Dan asked. Phil took a deep breath and said, "Not really but I will be."  
Dan smiled and pulled away from Phil so he could kiss him properly. When their lips touched it was just as magical as the first time. After about a minute, Dan said, "Come on, I'll make you a cup of tea." He pulled Phil up by the hand and dragged him out of the room.


	4. Chapter four

Chapter four: Cuddles, bruises and glass doors.

"Is there anything else on?" Dan asked.  
"I'll look now," Phil replied as he started flipping through the channels. It was half one on a sunny Friday afternoon. Dan and Phil had decided to stay in since they were expecting PJ at any minute. They had been together two days now and weren't looking back. Dan was loving every minute of it. Sat on the sofa, cup of tea in hand, wrapped in his boyfriend's arms; he wouldn't want it any other way. He was in complete serenity when a knock sounded at the door. Annoyed, he tried to ignore it. Although, when there was another knock, Phil made to get up. Dan hung on to him, trying to keep him on the sofa.  
"Dan!" Phil laughed, "I've got to answer the door. It's PJ." After a couple of seconds Dan gave in reluctantly. He turned off the TV while Phil went to greet PJ. "Hey Peej!" Dan heard through the wall. There was talk and then Phil appeared at the doorway with PJ in tow. "Hey Dan," He smiled. Dan got up and gave PJ a hug. "Hey," He grinned. They hadn't seen PJ for a while.

While catching up with PJ on the sofa, Dan kept glancing at Phil. Even though they weren't that far apart, he hated the distance between them. He wanted to pull him into a hug, kiss him or at least hold his hand. But of course he couldn't; PJ was there.  
"And that's it," PJ said after telling them what he'd been doing recently, "What have you guys been up to?"  
Phil looked at Dan this time.  
"The same as usual really," Dan answered when Phil didn't say anything.  
"You guys haven't got any news at all?" PJ enquired. To Dan, it was like PJ knew and he was trying to get it out of them. Of course that was impossible but Dan couldn't help but think it.  
"I'll let you know if I think of anything," Phil spoke at last, "Do you want a drink?"

PJ said his drink order and Phil went into the kitchen to fulfil it. After a moment, Dan appeared in the room after Phil.  
"Um… Should we tell him?" He whispered so PJ couldn't hear him.  
"I honestly don't know," Phil shrugged as he opened the fridge.  
"Well we haven't told anyone yet. Do you think we should start?"  
"To tell people?"  
"Yeah."  
"Maybe but we don't want to rush things. We only got together two days ago."  
Dan nodded. He knew that Phil was right but he couldn't wait to tell people how happy he was. Although, this would bring a lot of controversy with the fans.  
"Don't worry," Phil brought Dan out of his reverie, "We'll tell people soon."  
Dan nodded again. Phil turned back to the tea. He almost dropped the milk when Dan surprised him by putting his arms around him.  
"Dan," He murmured, "Not right now." But Dan didn't let go. Phil smiled and turned around so Dan was hugging him properly instead. He put his arms around him. "What's up?" He questioned.  
Dan looked up at him. "I want you," He whispered.  
Phil smiled and said, "You have me."  
Dan shook his head and then Phil realised what Dan meant. His smile faded and he went red. Dan laughed at Phil's face. Stuck between the counter and Dan, Phil was stranded. "Uhh…" He mumbled. Dan moved closer, pushing Phil right against the counter.  
"Dan!" Phil whined.  
Dan laughed again. He wasn't kidding but Phil's reaction was hilarious. To calm him down, Dan pulled Phil into a kiss. After a few minutes, they pulled apart. Panting for breath, Dan looked at Phil who was smiling. He opened his mouth to speak but something in the corner of his eye made him stop. He closed his mouth slowly and moved away from Phil. Phil, who was still looking at Dan, frowned. He turned and looked in the direction that Dan was gaping at. As soon as he saw, his heart stopped. PJ was standing behind the door, shock obvious in his eyes.

No one spoke until Phil caught his breath and said, "Peej… Uh… This isn't what it looks like."  
Dan looked at Phil. It was exactly what it looked like! They had just made out in the middle of the kitchen.  
Dan decided to take it in a different approach, "How much did you see?"  
PJ opened his mouth but no sound came out. He just pointed in the direction of the lounge and slowly backed away. As soon as he was out of sight Dan raked a hand through his hair, "Shit. Fuck. Shit. Fuck. Shit. Fuck!"  
Phil didn't say anything, he was still staring at the closed door.  
"Why do we have this fucking glass door?!" Dan exploded, kicking the door.  
Phil stayed silent.  
Dan kicked the door again with such force that instead of damaging the door, he damaged his foot. "Shit!" He moaned as he fell over.  
Without a second thought, Phil came back to life and rushed over to Dan and sat next to him. "Are you ok?" He asked, worried.  
Dan had his head in his hands. He didn't say anything which worried Phil even more.  
"Dan?" His expression grew tense, "Answer me!"  
Dan looked up, he had just about managed to hold back the tears. "I'm fine," He mumbled.  
Phil sighed. "So… what do we do?" He asked.  
Dan shrugged.  
"So much for not telling anyone," Phil tried to lighten the mood.  
Dan nodded slowly as he pulled himself up using the counter.  
Phil helped him, making sure that he put none of his weight on the foot he had hurt. As soon as his was standing again, Dan cautiously tried out his foot. However, he soon pulled it back up again and sighed in pain.  
"Does it hurt?" Phil asked anxiously.  
"Of course it fucking does!" Dan snapped.  
Phil looked down sadly. Dan looked at him and realised that he'd hurt his feelings. "I'm sorry Phil!" He quickly said.  
Phil, still looking down, nodded and whispered, "I'll get you some ice, go and rest your foot."  
Dan felt guilty and reached out for Phil's hand.  
Phil pulled it out of reach and went to the freezer.  
Rejected, Dan limped into the lounge and put his foot up on the table. PJ was sitting on the sofa and looked alarmed when Dan appeared. Dan didn't say anything, he wasn't in the mood anymore.  
PJ surprised him by saying, "I'm sorry for walking in on you guys."  
"You didn't. It's not your fault that we have a fucking glass door."  
"Still," PJ continued, "That was private. I'm sorry."  
"Its fine," Dan muttered, "You were going to find out anyway."  
Phil came in then, ice pack in hand. "Let me have a look at your foot," He said.  
Dan sighed and pulled off his sock. There were blotches of purple, yellow and red along the side of his foot.  
Phil sighed and plumped a pillow underneath it.  
"How'd you do that?" PJ frowned.  
"He was showing off," Phil replied, "Having a bit of a tantrum."  
Dan rolled his eyes. "It wasn't a tantrum," He moaned.  
"Dan," Phil looked at him, "You kicked the door."  
Dan couldn't think of anything to say to hold his side of the argument so kept quiet.  
"What did you kick the door for?" PJ asked.  
Dan looked at him and then PJ realised. "Oh…" He said.  
Phil put the ice pack on Dan's foot. As Phil did this, Dan squinted in pain.  
"You'll have to keep it up for the rest of the day," Phil told him, "Hopefully it'll feel better tomorrow."  
"I'm sorry Phil," PJ suddenly said, "For… well you know."  
"Its fine," Phil shook it off, "You were going to find out anyway."  
PJ smiled, "That's exactly what Dan said."  
Phil looked over to Dan who grinned sheepishly. Phil smiled back at him before looking at PJ again.  
"So… How long have you guys been together?" PJ asked awkwardly.  
"Um… Two days," Phil blushed.  
"Oh," PJ said, "I thought you guys might have been together all along and just didn't tell me or Chris… Does Chris know?" He added.  
Dan shook his head, "No one knows. Well apart from you."  
PJ thought about this, "So I'm the first person to know?"  
"Yeah…" Phil looked away.  
"Cool," PJ smiled, "If it's any consolation, I always thought that you two would make a good couple."  
Dan laughed then, all the anger gone. "Thanks," He grinned.

"See you Peej!" Phil waved him off from the door. PJ grinned, waved and disappeared from sight. Phil closed the door and went back into the lounge. Dan was asleep on the sofa, his foot still up on the table. Phil smiled to himself, he still couldn't believe that this beautiful sleeping man was his. He went to get his duvet and wrapped it around Dan. Dan stirred but didn't wake. Phil put on his pyjamas and snuggled up next to Dan. He put on the TV and soon drifted off as well.


	5. Chapter five

Chapter five: Coffee, embarrassment and awkward conversations.

"Just tell him you're not ready yet," PJ sipped his coffee. Phil nodded; he wasn't too sure about this.  
He had met up with PJ at Starbucks a couple days after PJ had come over.  
"I've been through this myself," PJ continued.  
"You have?" Phil frowned.  
"Yeah… Well not with a guy."  
Phil smirked, "Yeah ok."  
"And um… It was when I was a virgin."  
Phil slowly nodded again. This wasn't really helping.  
"This girl, Cathy, was pressuring me to have sex and…" He stopped and looked at the table next to them. A little girl was staring at them. PJ smiled at her before leaning closer to Phil so he couldn't be overheard as easily as before.  
"…and so I unwillingly agreed to, but at the last minute I couldn't go through with it. She called me a wimp and never spoke to me again."  
"That's what I'm worried about," Phil explained, "I don't want him to get angry at me."  
"But this is different," PJ said, "I was a virgin. You're not. At least… Are you?"  
Phil looked at him, "Of course not!"  
"Just checking," PJ grinned.  
Phil rolled his eyes. "Besides that, how is it different?" He asked.  
"For one, you two actually have feelings for each other. I didn't even like Cathy and I think she only wanted to have sex with me."  
Phil thought about this. Sure they had feelings for each other. They hadn't talked about how they felt since that first night when Dan announced his. Maybe they should talk about it a bit more.  
"And," PJ kept going, "You're older. I was sixteen."  
"Sixteen?!" Phil was shocked.  
"I know. I'm glad I didn't sleep with her." PJ smiled back at his decision.  
Phil didn't quite know what to say. He still needed advice on what to say to Dan but PJ was deep in thought. He waited until PJ blinked and said, "Uh sorry."  
"It's ok," Phil smiled.  
"Where was I? Oh yeah. So the age is different and if you talk to him properly, not wait until you're both down to your undies, he'll listen. He won't storm out of your life. You guys are too close for that to happen. If you explain that you're not ready, he'll hopefully be understanding and take your feelings into account."  
"I really don't want to do this," Phil sighed.  
"Don't worry," PJ comforted, "Not everybody is ready first time. You have to wait until you have the confidence. Sure you've had sex before but with a guy? Nope. It's different and I understand that. You're getting out of your comfort zone. Of course you'll be a little scared."  
Phil took a deep breath. He was dreading this but he knew it had to be done.

"Hey!" Dan came into the lounge to see that Phil was watching TV. Phil was nervous and didn't look at him. Dan knew at once that something was wrong.  
"What's up?" He asked, jumping down next to Phil.  
Phil didn't reply so Dan switched off the TV and waited.  
Phil reluctantly looked at Dan. Dan smiled and repeated the question.  
This time Phil replied, "I… Nothing."  
"Come on, you're not fooling anyone."  
Phil sighed.  
"There!" Dan made him jump.  
"What?" He asked.  
"You sighed. You never sigh. Something's up."  
Phil opened his mouth but soon closed it again.  
Dan knew that Phil needed a bit of confidence so surprised him by leaning in for a kiss.  
After the kiss, Dan said, "Feeling better?"  
Phil nodded, blushing.  
"So what is it?" Dan pressed on.  
"I… need to talk to you." Phil finally spoke.  
"I kind of figured that already." Dan smirked. He wasn't growing impatient because he knew that this was serious for Phil.  
"So what's this all about?" He asked, all joking aside.  
"I can't say," Phil murmured, "It's too embarrassing."  
Dan thought for a second and then said, "Ok… But you need to tell me?"  
Phil nodded.  
"So you need to tell me but can't… This may take a while." Dan smiled.  
Phil felt guilty. Even though Dan would make it out as not a big deal, he would secretly be annoyed. He knew Dan too well.  
Phil knew that he had to get it over and done with. "It's about… sex," He blushed again.  
That wasn't really what Dan had expected but then again what had he expected? He frowned, "Ok…"  
"And um…" Phil didn't quite know how to say it, "I just want to tell you…"  
"You have had sex before right Phil?" Dan cut in.  
"Yes! Why does everyone ask that?" Phil was annoyed now.  
"I'm sorry," Dan smirked, "Of course you have. What is it then?"  
"Well I don't know about you…" Phil continued, "But I haven't had sex…"  
Dan raised his eyebrow.  
"…with a guy before." Phil finished.  
"Oh!" Dan finally understood. "I haven't either, don't worry. We'll work it out," He grinned.  
"But the thing is," Phil sighed. "I don't want to. Not yet anyway."  
Dan opened his mouth but closed it as Phil had started speaking again.  
"It's not that I don't want to… Well I don't want to yet. I'm just… not ready."  
"Aw Phil!" Dan surprised him by pulling him into a hug.  
After the embrace, Dan said, "Look, its fine."  
"It's not though," Phil couldn't meet his eyes, "I've let you down."  
"Phil we haven't been together for even a week yet. Sure I was pressuring you a bit the other day but that's just because I'm an impatient asshole. Sorry I didn't take what you wanted into perspective. I haven't been in a proper relationship for a while now so I guess I'm just so used to being selfish and doing what I want. I'm thinking about you more now though. I am sorry that I did that to you. I caught you off-guard and even though _I_ find it sexy, you may not. We'll wait as long as you want. I'm not going anywhere and I'm not jumping into bed anytime soon either. Well apart from sleeping."  
Phil's eyes brimmed with tears. Dan was amazing.  
He pulled Dan into a hug this time. Dan smiled.  
"Did you think that all I care about is sex or something?" He laughed.  
"Well no," Phil muttered.  
"Of course I care about it," Dan laughed, "But I care about you more."  
They pulled apart but leaned back in for a kiss.  
"Thanks for understanding," Phil smiled.  
"Its ok," Dan grinned, "I just want you to be happy. I know that sounds cheesy as shit but its true."  
Phil laughed.

"Phillip!" Dan called down the hall, "Your mother is on the phone."  
Phil came out of his room and took the phone out of Dan's hand.  
"Hey mum," He spoke into the receiver.  
"Hi darling. How are you?" His mum replied.  
"I'm good. How are you?" He grinned.  
"I'm good thank you. I was just ringing to remind you about your dad's birthday."  
"Yes mum I remember."  
"Good. What time will you be down on Saturday?"  
"You told me ten o'clock so I suppose twelve?"  
"Very funny. Ten it is."  
"Why are we sorting it out now? It's not for two weeks."  
"I just want everything to be perfect for your father." His mum answered.  
"Yeah ok," Phil smiled.  
"Martin will already be here when you arrive. He's coming the day before."  
"So all you guys will be there to wish him a happy birthday as soon as he wakes up and I have to wait until ten?"  
"You can come earlier if you want. I just didn't want you to get up too early."  
"It's fine. I'll stick to ten."  
"It's not my fault you live so far away."  
"London isn't that far mum," Phil sighed.  
"It is for me. Now, I've got to go. I'll talk to you in a couple of days."  
"Bye mum."  
"Bye Phil. I love you."  
"I love you too."  
His mum hung up and he returned the phone to its cradle.

It was just his dad's birthday, he had one every year. His mum was making this more complicated than it needed to be.

"Hey, what was that about?" Dan came back into the lounge.  
"Just about my dad's birthday again."  
"Geez, she's been calling about that for the past week," Dan smirked.  
"Yeah I know. Well you know what mums are like." Phil smiled.  
"Yeah, I do," Dan laughed, putting his arms around Phil.  
"Are you sure you're ok with waiting?" Phil asked suddenly.  
"I told you I was. It's fine."  
Phil, still unsure said, "I just feel like I'm holding you back."  
"From sex? I think I'll survive." Dan laughed again.  
Dan pulled away and looked at Phil, but Phil avoided his eye contact.  
"What is it- A few less blowjobs? It's not like I had any beforehand. I'm not going to die from sex starved purposes."  
A small smile hinted on Phil's lips.  
Dan knew that Phil would be ok soon. He just needed to be cheered up a bit.  
"Although," Dan continued, "I might die from wanting you so bad."  
A full smile appeared on Phil's lips.  
"There it is," Dan grinned, "That smile I've been waiting for."  
He pulled Phil onto the sofa and they both lay there, wrapped in each other's arms. Complete serenity was upon them.


	6. Chapter six

Chapter six: Dinner, jeans and jokes.

It had been a week since Dan had promised to wait until Phil was ready to have sex. He wasn't growing impatient, just antsy. Every time he saw Phil, he just wanted to rip his top off and-

"Dan?"  
"Huh? What?" Dan was pulled out of his daydream.  
"Did you even hear what I said?" Phil crossed his arms.  
"Uh… Yes?" Dan lied.  
"What was it then?" Phil smirked. He knew Dan hadn't heard anything he had said in the last five minutes. He just liked to watch him squirm.  
"You said…" Dan mumbled, thinking on his feet, "That I look sexy as ever today. You know it's true," He winked.  
"Not even close," Phil laughed.  
"It's true though," Dan winked again.  
Phil shook his head, "Sure it is."  
"What did you say then?" Dan sat up.  
"I asked if you wanted to go out for dinner or did you want to get a takeaway."  
"Oh… Um can we get a takeaway?"  
"Yeah sure, what do you fancy?" Phil asked, going to get the takeout menus from the kitchen.  
"Chinese?"  
"What else?" Phil grinned, coming back into the room with the takeout menu from their local Chinese takeaway and restaurant.

They ordered their food and while they waited they started watching a film in the lounge. They had both seen it before. That was the reason Phil had chosen it. So they could talk about other stuff and just have it on in the background.  
Dan put his arm around Phil protectively and Phil cuddled up next to Dan.  
"Dan?" Phil looked up at him.  
"Yeah?"  
"Do you know how long we've been together now?" Phil asked.  
"Um… Nearly two weeks now I suppose," Dan answered.  
"Yeah, basically one and a half weeks."  
"Wow," Dan smiled, "That went quick."  
"It did, didn't it?" Phil grinned.  
They were quiet for a moment until Phil said, "Can I ask you something?"  
"Go ahead."  
"Do you think we talk about our feelings enough?"  
Dan frowned, "Uh… I don't know. You sound like a girl Phil."  
"I know," Phil continued, "I just read about it that's all."  
"Read about what exactly?"  
"Well, before I moved out of my parent's house, I read one of my mum's magazines."  
"Like everyone else does naturally," Dan smirked.  
"I was ill! I had nothing else to do," Phil defended himself.  
"Of course that's the reason," Dan held back a laugh, "So does this story have a moral?"  
"So," Phil said, ignoring Dan's last comment, "There was this one section called 'Ten ways and tips to secure a stable relationship."  
"Funny how you remembered the whole title," Dan laughed this time.  
"Shut up. So I can't remember much of it-"  
"Apart from the whole title of the section," Dan cut in.  
"-but I do remember one bit," Phil said, ignoring Dan again.  
"It was something like: '7- Do you and your partner talk about your feelings and relationship enough? You need to talk about that sort of thing to keep a stable relationship secure. Otherwise you'll drift apart and there will be an inevitable break-up.'"  
"It actually said, 'that sort of stuff'?" Dan smirked.  
"Well no, of course not. I told you, I don't remember all of it. There was a big chunk as well but I can't remember that either." Phil replied.  
"Well ok. So what are you trying to tell me?" Dan asked.  
"Didn't you listen to me? I just told you," Phil pouted.  
"Of course I was listening. So you want us to talk about our feelings more?"  
"Well it wouldn't hurt," Phil looked away.  
"Ok…" Dan thought about this, "When was the last time we did?"  
"The first night we got together. Technically, I've never told you how _I _feel," Phil said uncomfortably.  
"You haven't?" Dan frowned, "I thought the kiss kind of gave it away."  
"I suppose," Phil mumbled.  
"Ok then," Dan stood up.  
"What are you doing?" Phil raised his eyebrow.  
"What are your feelings towards me?" Dan started turning in circles, "Do you like me? Do you love me? Do I turn you on?"  
He started doing his sexy end screen dance.  
Phil was finding it hard not to burst out laughing. "What are you doing?" He asked again once he'd composed himself.  
"Just finding out how my boyfriend feels about me," Dan smirked.  
Dan had never called Phil that before. He knew he was his boyfriend but neither of them had said it out loud before.  
Dan realised this too and stopped swaying. Silence was thrust upon them until Dan decided to speak, "I never thought I'd be saying that."  
Phil nodded. "This isn't weird is it?" Phil looked down.  
"Of course not." Dan crossed his arms, "Why...? Do you think it is?"  
"No," Phil snapped his head back up, "It's just that… It's nothing."  
Dan sighed and sat back down next to Phil. "So I called you my boyfriend. So what? That's what you are. Unless you don't want to be…"  
"Of course I want that!" Phil snapped, "It's just-"  
There was a knock at the door. That would be the food.  
Phil stopped talking. Dan sighed again and went to answer the door. Phil decided that he would forgot his worries and hopefully the evening would go back to the way it was before all the awkwardness.

A few minutes later, Dan came back in but this time with a bag of food. "Right," He said, taking charge, "No food until you tell me what's worrying you."  
"Seriously?"  
"Yes, seriously. Now tell me." Dan was adamant to hear what was troubling his boyfriend.  
Phil finally gave in after a few seconds, "It's just that whenever we kiss or get close or you call me your boyfriend, it goes all awkward and silent. Have you noticed that?"  
"I actually have. I wasn't going to say anything though," Dan admitted.  
"You obviously didn't read that magazine," Phil smiled a small smile.  
"Oh yeah," Dan remembered, "'Do you and your partner talk about your feelings and relationship enough?'"  
"Obviously not," Phil looked down.  
"Look, it's not like we've been together for years or even months. Not even weeks! Just week. One week. Nearly two but basically one week."  
"It's closer to two weeks than one," Phil remarked.  
"Whatever," Dan shrugged. "I think I know why it always goes awkward," He added, going into the kitchen with the food.  
Phil followed him, "Why then?"  
"Because we've been friends for so long. Of course it's going to be awkward at first," Dan answered.  
Phil thought about this. It sounded plausible.  
"I see where you're coming from," Phil said while in deep thought.  
"Do you also see that I'm right?"  
"Well yeah," Phil replied, helping Dan dish out the food.  
"I have an idea about how to make it stop too," Dan didn't look at him as he said this.  
"How…?" Phil raised an eyebrow.  
"Well we can't do it," Dan said, "You're not ready." He looked at him this time and sniggered.  
"Oh…" Realisation came over Phil, "Isn't there anything else?"  
"Not really," Dan grinned, "We need to break that barrier and I think that sleeping with each other is the way to do that."  
Phil knew that he was right.  
"Look Phil," Dan put his hands on Phil's shoulders, "I know you're scared. What are you scared of though? It's not like one of us could get pregnant or something. Unless…" Dan raised his eyebrow, "Unless there's something you haven't told me..."  
Phil rolled his eyes.  
"Ok, ok! Joking aside. What are you scared of?"  
"Uh…."  
"You can tell me." Dan looked Phil straight in the eyes and kept his hands on his shoulders so he couldn't escape.  
"I'm scared that…"  
Dan urged him on with his eyes.  
"That I won't be good enough. I've never… I've never slept with a guy before. I don't know what to do," Phil went red.  
Dan couldn't help but smile. Phil was too cute for his own good.  
Phil looked down. Dan put his hand under his chin and pulled his head back up.  
"Phil…" He said soothingly, "Those are all valid reasons to be scared. I understand. To be honest I had all of those concerns when we first got together."  
"But you don't anymore?" Phil sniffed.  
"No… But only because…" Dan looked down this time.  
"What?" Phil frowned.  
"I knew I had to get some experience without you know… actually doing it so I turned to the internet…" Dan dropped his arms from Phil's shoulders. He looked at the dished up food. "You know our food's going to be cold soon?" He smiled.  
They sat at the table in the kitchen, forgetting about the TV in the next room. They didn't usually sit at the table but neither of them wanted to be distracted from their important conversation.

"The internet?" Phil asked after a minute.  
"Yeah, you know… I looked up…" He mumbled something under his breath.  
"You looked up what?" Phil urged.  
"Gay porn!" Dan said loudly.  
They were both silent for a minute until Phil said, "Let's hope the neighbours didn't hear that."  
Dan simpered, "They've heard weirder."  
"I wouldn't be too sure about that," Phil grinned. "So did you find anything… good?" He asked.  
"Yeah I suppose. It gave me a better understanding if that's what you mean."  
Phil nodded. They were silent while they ate.  
Five minutes later, Dan suddenly said, "Do you want to know if it turned me on?"  
"Uh…" Phil mumbled.  
"It did," Dan said casually.  
Phil swallowed, "Oh… Ok…" He didn't quite know what to say.  
Dan was enjoying making Phil feel uncomfortable so decided to carry on, "It only took a minute for me to get hot."  
Phil stopped eating.  
Dan started laughing silently. Phil was too distracted to notice.  
"I had to undo my jeans…"  
Phil bit his lip, forgetting about his food.  
Dan had stopped eating too. He was watching Phil's reaction while sniggering away.  
"I did leave the door partly open…" Dan continued, "I was hoping you'd drop by. Maybe join me…"  
Phil was breathing a bit more heavily now. He looked down at his jeans. Of course.  
"Uh… I've gotta… go to the toilet," He muttered, going red but not from embarrassment.  
Dan raised an eyebrow. "Go ahead," He smiled sweetly.  
Phil knew that he couldn't slide past without Dan noticing his… bulge.  
He stood up. Dan's eyes widened. "Wow Phil," He managed to stop himself laughing, "I didn't know you had it in you."  
Phil ignored him and quickly dashed to the bathroom.  
When Phil had left, Dan started laughing but soon realised that his jeans had gone a bit tight too…  
"Aw shit…"  
The joke had gone a bit further than he had intended…


	7. Chapter seven

Chapter seven: Videos, teasing and bottles.

"_Come on Phil, you can do this_," He thought as he sat at his desk with his laptop on Google. "_What do I search_?"

He stared at the screen for a minute before his hands hovered over the keyboard.  
He decided to get straight to the point and typed into the search bar, "gay porn"  
A lot of results came up. Phil swallowed slowly and clicked on the first link. What came up shocked him. He quickly clicked back to the search page.  
After getting over the shock of the first page, Phil hesitantly clicked on the second link. This page wasn't as bad; Just a few pictures.  
Phil scanned the photos, looking away when the picture was a little too revealing.  
Soon he got used to the scenes that the pictures displayed and decided to watch a video. Bracing himself, he clicked on the one that sounded the most harmless. It was really cheesy at the start; Just a couple of guys sharing a drink and chatting. Soon they were making out.

Phil watched intently, biting his lip. He started thinking about Dan. They had never had a full on snog like that before. They had come close though; that first night they got together and when PJ had visited, but not properly.

Phil realised that he wasn't even looking at the screen anymore. He glanced over to see that both men were down to their underwear.  
As the video continued, Phil looked away a few times if it was a little out of his comfort zone but soon got used to it. It was seven minutes in total. When it had finished, Phil decided that that would be it for today. He shut down his laptop and sat back in his chair. That had given him a clearer view of what to expect and he felt a little bit more confident.

He looked down at his bulge and sighed. He knew he had to slip into the bathroom and sort it out. What if Dan saw him though? He didn't want him laughing at him again.  
He opened his door and peeked out. He heard Dan talking in his room. Making a video. After a minute, he chose to make a run for it and sneaked into the bathroom. He sat on the toilet and tried to think of something else but his mind kept going back to that video. Soon he was thinking about when he and Dan would be doing that sort of thing. He was getting hotter and hotter. He knew that forgetting about his erection was impossible so got to work.

"It's the sexy end screen dance! Click this box to subscribe to my channel and if you haven't seen it already, here's a link to my last video." Dan wrapped up his video and uploaded the footage straight onto his Mac. He wasn't in the mood to edit so saved it and wondered into the lounge. Phil wasn't in there. He turned on the TV while he waited for Phil to appear.  
After about ten minutes or so, when Dan had gone to get his phone out of his room, Phil appeared from out of the bathroom.  
"There you are," Dan smiled.  
Phil looked down. He was red in the face and still catching his breath.  
Dan realised what he had been doing immediately. "So," He smirked, "What have you been up to?"  
Phil squirmed uncomfortably under his boyfriend's gaze, "Uh nothing."  
"Really?" Dan carried on, "Because to me it looks like you've been doing something very specific…"  
Phil didn't say anything.  
"Am I right?" Dan raised his eyebrow.  
Phil looked away again awkwardly.  
Dan smiled. "Hot," He grinned, "Next time wait for me ok?"  
Phil smiled at his feet.  
"What's brought this on then?" Dan questioned.  
Phil didn't understand the question so frowned.  
"Did you have a thought? Did you read something? Did you watch something?"  
"I'm not telling you that," Phil smirked.  
"Aw! No details at all?" Dan pleaded.  
Phil shook his head, still smiling.  
Dan pretended to be gutted, "Party pooper!"  
Phil smiled to himself as he escaped to the comfort of his room.

Getting his phone, Dan thought about Phil's time in the bathroom. Before long he was getting hot too.  
"_Dammit_!" He thought as he looked down to his lap.  
Being a guy was annoying when it came to being horny. It wasn't exactly something you could hide easily.  
It wasn't too obvious yet though. Dan never tried to forget about his erections. He got rid of them an easier way.  
Grabbing his lube, he hightailed to the bathroom.

Phil, now composed, came out of his bedroom and went to get a drink. Before he could do so however, he noticed that Dan's door was open and his nightstand draw was left open.  
Confused, Phil wandered over to the bathroom. The door was shut. He was about to go into the lounge, when he heard Dan on the other side of the door. He was breathing rather heavily.  
Phil held back a grin and sneaked into the lounge. The TV was still on from when Dan was waiting for Phil to be done. Phil didn't watch it though. He was thinking about Dan. He was careful not to get stiff again though.

Unless Dan had chosen to get hard really quickly, the only explanation was that Phil had turned him on. Phil smiled to himself.

Phil had never thought that he was sexy or wanted in that way before. He just thought that his past girlfriends had slept with him because it was part of being in a relationship or out of pity.  
But Dan _did_ want him that way. He had said so before too but Phil had never believed it for a second.

Soon, Phil heard the bathroom door slowly open. He jumped up and walked into the hallway. Dan was creeping back into his room.  
"Hey," Phil smiled knowingly, "What have you been up to?"  
"Uhh…" Dan stuttered, hiding the lube behind his back.  
"What's that?" Phil tried looking behind Dan's back.  
"Uh nothing…" Dan danced out of the way.  
Phil raised his eyebrow. He knew he had the upper hand on this one. "Well it's obviously something. Am I not allowed to see?" He asked innocently.  
Dan knew he was had. "Well played Lester," He winked as he threw the lube at him.  
Phil caught it and looked at the label.  
Quickly he gave it back to Dan and blushed.  
"Why are _you_ embarrassed?" Dan frowned.  
"I don't know," Phil looked away.  
"Are your eyes too innocent to see this?" He smiled, holding up the bottle.  
Phil opened his mouth but closed it quickly.  
"If you react this way to just looking at lube, how are you going to react when I actually use it on you?"  
Phil looked up sharply. Dan had gone back into his bedroom. Phil followed him to see that he was putting the bottle back in his drawer.  
"You're going to what?" Phil asked quietly.  
"Use it on you. Lube you. You know, lubricate," Dan winked.  
"I know what it is," Phil said.  
"Really? And there's me thinking you didn't," Dan smirked. "Look Phil," He said, taking a gentler tone, "Can I ask you something?" He sat on his bed as he asked this.  
Phil followed suit and perched on the end of it. "Yeah."  
"You know that I find you attractive," He looked down, "And that you make me hard when I think about you. But… Well… Do you think I'm attractive?"  
Phil smiled at his self-conscious boyfriend.  
"Of course I do!" He waited until Dan looked up again.  
"Really? You're not just saying that right?"  
"Why do you think I had to go in the bathroom in the first place? It wasn't because of that rubbish video I was watching."  
"You were watching porn?" Dan couldn't help but smile.  
"Uh…" Phil went red again.  
"You were!" Dan laughed, "What kind?"  
Phil bit his lip.  
"You watched gay porn didn't you?" Dan smiled again.  
"Maybe…" Phil smiled too.  
"Hm... Not as innocent as I thought," Dan raised his eyebrow and looked Phil up and down.  
Phil rolled his eyes and shrugged.  
"You won't be very innocent soon anyway," Dan winked, "Not when I'm done with you."  
Phil couldn't help but smile as he looked down.  
There was silence for a minute until… "I love you Phil."  
A surprised Phil looked up to see Dan who was looking down, smiling.  
Phil found it hard to stop smiling like an idiot. "I-I love you too Dan," He whispered.  
Dan looked up at him. Phil had gone red again which was just another reason for Dan to adore him.  
"You do?" Dan started pinching his hand to make sure he wasn't dreaming.  
"Yeah... Yeah, I do," Phil had only just realised it. He started grinning and repeated, "I do! I do love you! How have I only just realised this?!"  
While watching him, Dan thought how adorable Phil was.  
"Phil?"  
Phil stopped his little happy freak out and looked at Dan.  
Dan didn't say anything, he just moved closer to Phil and pulled him into a hug.  
They embraced for a while and were soon kissing.  
After a few minutes, Phil pulled away.  
Dan gave him a puzzled expression.  
"I want the first time to be perfect," Phil explained.  
Dan nodded. "However it happens, it'll be perfect," He smiled.  
Phil smiled back at him and they lay back on the bed.  
Dan was right, it would be perfect.  
Phil thought about this while they lay there, their arms wrapped around each other.


	8. Chapter eight

**I just want to say, this story has gotten over 1,000 views! WOW! Thanks guys! :D**

* * *

Chapter eight: Phone calls, friends and snogs.

"Phil?"  
"I'm busy Dan!" Phil called back. He was on his bed, reading comments from his latest video.  
Dan appeared in his doorway. He leaned against the frame.

"I have a problem," Dan said.  
Phil looked up at him, "What is it?"  
"I haven't received any attention for the last half an hour!" Dan moaned, smiling.  
"How on Earth have you survived this long?" Phil grinned.  
"I have no idea but it was a struggle!" Dan laughed.  
Phil laughed with him.  
"But seriously," Dan said, "I miss you. What are you doing?"  
"Just reading comments," Phil replied, looking back at the screen.  
"That doesn't seem that important," Dan remarked.  
Phil looked at him again, "Yes it is. Without our fans, where would we be?"  
"Well yeah… I forgot about that," Dan said guiltily, "Don't tell them I said that. Otherwise, they'll want my head on a spike."  
"Don't worry, I won't say a word," Phil promised.

Dan sat across from Phil on the bed.  
"When will you be done?" He asked.  
"I don't know."  
"Well-" Dan was cut off by Phil's phone.

Phil answered it, "Hey PJ."  
Dan waited, listening to Phil.  
"…What? How did you do that? Never mind, just… just bring him over here."  
Dan was now very confused.  
"Yeah… See you in a bit," Phil ended the call.

Phil sighed, shut down his laptop and left the room.  
"What's going on?" Dan asked, catching up to him.  
"Uh… Well…" Phil didn't quite know how to say it, "PJ… told Chris about us."  
"What?!" Dan exploded.  
"He said it was by accident!" Phil said quickly.  
"How did he do that by accident?" Dan crossed his arms.  
"I don't know. They're coming over now." Phil put away some of their video games that had ended up on the floor in the lounge.  
"Great," Dan wrinkled his nose.  
"Come on, we've got to talk to him," Phil persuaded him.  
"Whatever," Dan shrugged, going into the kitchen.

Phil followed him and started cleaning up the side.  
"What are you doing?" Dan questioned.  
"Tidying up a bit before they arrive," Phil explained, putting plates in the dishwasher.

Dan rubbed his eyes, he was annoyed that PJ had somehow let slip about his relationship with Phil. How did he even do that?

There was a knock at the door. Phil gave Dan a worried look. Dan knew that he had to let it go and gave Phil a hug.  
"It'll be fine," He said soothingly, "It's just Chris."  
Phil nodded.  
"I'll get the door." Dan left the kitchen and went down to the front door. He took a deep breath before opening it.

PJ and Chris stood there. Chris grinned widely and PJ gave Dan a sympathetic smile.

Before Chris could say anything, Dan said, "Go in the lounge. I'll get Phil."  
Chris and PJ walked up the stairs while Dan slowly shut the door.

Phil was leaning on the counter in the kitchen.  
Ok, so two people knew. There was nothing wrong with that.  
They should have told Chris when PJ found out anyway.  
But then again, they hadn't intended to tell him either.

Dan appeared in the doorway.  
"Come on Phil," He half smiled, trying to encourage him.  
Phil reluctantly walked over to him.  
"It'll be fine. It's just Chris," Dan repeated his words from earlier.

Dan grabbed an energy drink from the fridge, feeling that he'd it.

They walked into the lounge. Chris and PJ were sitting on the sofa. Chris was grinning like a Cheshire cat and PJ was looking at his feet.

Dan and Phil sat opposite them.

"I'm sorry guys!" PJ suddenly said, "I honestly didn't mean to! It just came out!"  
"Its fine Peej," Phil smiled a small smile.  
"How exactly did it come out anyway?" Dan questioned.  
"Well," PJ began, "Chris and I were talking and…"  
"And what?" Dan was still pissed.  
"And Chris said maybe we should all go on a double date thing but with four of us. I'm not sure what that's called and I said…"  
"What did you say PJ?"  
"I said, 'No, they're pretty happy together.' So yeah…"  
"Oh Peej…" Phil sighed.  
"I'm sorry," PJ looked sad.  
"It's fine," Dan said.

Phil looked at Dan, surprised that he'd been so forgiving so easily.

"So…" Said Chris, coming into the conversation, "You guys are a couple then?"  
Phil nodded slowly.  
"How come you didn't tell me?" Chris asked, "Actually, how come you told PJ and not me?"  
"We didn't tell PJ. He saw us… Uh kissing," Dan replied.  
This made Chris bite his lip to stop him from laughing.

"So who's who?" Chris began to smile again as he changed the subject.  
"What do you mean?" Dan frowned.  
"Who's the giver and who's the receiver? Who gives it and who receives it?"

Phil's eyes widened in horror. Dan spat out his drink.  
"Nice Dan," PJ commented.  
"So?" Chris wasn't letting this go.  
Dan, after clearing himself up, decided to speak as Phil looked horrified, "Well… the thing is… We haven't had a chance to figure that out yet…"  
"You guys haven't had sex yet?" He looked at Phil as he said this who just shook his head, slightly embarrassed.  
"Wow," He smirked, "How long have you guys been going out for?"  
"Nearly three weeks," Dan replied.  
"You guys sure work slow," Chris laughed.  
"Leave it out Chris," PJ rolled his eyes.  
"What? If I was going out with one of you guys, I wouldn't be able to keep my hands off of you."  
PJ became uncomfortable. This conversation had taken an odd turn. Dan didn't seem to mind though.

"I can't. He won't let me though," He looked at Phil.

They were holding hands on the sofa. Chris noticed this and smiled. They were pretty cute.

"So, anyone else know apart from us?" He asked.  
"No, and we intend to keep it that way," Dan hinted.

Chris got the message, "Hey, I won't tell anybody."  
"Thanks," Phil smiled, "We… We just aren't ready to become public. We haven't even told our parents yet."  
"Have fun when you do," Chris grinned.  
"Thank you Chris," Dan pulled a fake smile.  
"You are very welcome," Chris smirked.

"Do you guys want a drink?" Phil offered, being a good host.  
"Yes thanks," PJ accepted, "I won't bother you this time." He smiled as he said this.  
Phil smiled as he thought back to the last time PJ had come round. Dan remembered this too and grimaced.

Phil got up to go in the kitchen but Dan said, "I'll sort it."  
Phil smiled in return and sat back down.

"I'll help you," Chris followed him into the kitchen.

Phil got up and sat next to PJ.

"I am sorry," PJ whispered.  
"Its fine," Phil smiled, trying to cheer him up.

PJ hadn't forgiven himself. He had only just forgiven himself for the last thing he'd done to Dan and Phil. He was worried that this would affect their relationship in some way. He didn't want them to break up.

He didn't say anything though. He didn't want to make things even worse.

"So how's it going with Dan?" PJ shook these thoughts out of his head.  
"Good… Really good actually," Phil smiled.  
"Really? That's awesome. I never got to ask you how that talk with him went."  
"It went fine. He's promised to wait for me."  
"Aw that's cute," PJ grinned.

Phil smiled to himself.

In the kitchen, Dan put on the kettle.

"Are you actually going out? Seriously?" Chris asked as he waited.  
"Yes. Why don't you understand that?" Dan sighed, exasperated.  
"I just find it hard to believe that's all," Chris shrugged.  
"Why?" Dan was confused.  
"Because…" Chris thought for a moment, "Because you guys have been friends forever and _now_ you've only just realised that you like each other?"  
"Yeah and?"  
"Well, why now? Why not when you met?"  
Hm… Chris had a point.

Dan was reluctant to agree with him, "I… I see what you mean. I guess I kind of wondered that too but I don't really care. The only thing that pisses me off is the fact that I didn't realise it sooner. We might have got together a long time ago."

Chris nodded and they went back to silence.

While Dan made the drinks, Chris tried to think of a way to carry on the conversation. Before he could say anything however, Dan said, "Chris. Are you ok with me and Phil being together?"  
"Of course I am! Why would you ask that?"

Dan shrugged, "I was just wondering. I'm not sure how many people will accept us. We _will_ get a lot of hate."  
"But you'll also get a lot of support," Chris replied.

Dan nodded. He knew that was true but he was still scared to come out. He wouldn't anytime soon anyway since Phil was in no rush to tell anyone either.

The phone rang then.

"I'll get it," Chris offered since he was closest.

Dan took a couple of mugs into the lounge and Chris followed him with the phone.

Handing Phil his mug, Dan leant down and kissed him.

"No, he can't come to the phone right now. He's too busy having a snog."

Dan and Phil's eyes popped open. They pulled away and looked over to Chris who had just realised what he had just said.

"Oh Chris…" PJ shook his head.

"Yeah… Bye," Chris hung up.

"Who was that?" Dan glared.  
"It… It was… Your mum." Chris looked down.  
"What?! My mum?!" Dan yelled.  
"Yeah…" Chris sat down slowly.  
"For fuck sake!" Dan held his face in his hands.

Phil didn't say anything.

"I'm sorry! I didn't think!" Chris apologised.  
"Its fine Chris," Phil finally spoke.  
"At least you didn't say _who_ he was snogging," PJ looked on the brighter side.  
"What did she say?" Dan had now calmed down.  
"She just said 'I won't bother him then. Tell him I'll call back very, very soon.'" Chris said.  
"Great. Can't wait for that conversation."

Phil pulled Dan down next to him and Dan leant his head on Phil's shoulder.

"You can just say that you have a girlfriend," Phil suggested.  
"I don't really want to but I'm not ready for her to find out about us," Dan sighed.

Phil nodded as he stroked Dan's hair.

"Just tell her you have a girlfriend and then tell her about Phil when you're ready. I'm sure she'll understand," PJ advised.  
"Yeah… She will," Dan agreed.

"It seems that PJ and I are in the same boat," Chris commented.

The three sat across from him looked up at him.

"You know, the whole we almost mucked up your relationship thing," Chris explained.  
"Thanks Chris," PJ sighed.  
"It's true," Chris smiled.  
"Yeah ok," Dan shut him up.  
"Both times were unintentional," Phil tried to cheer PJ up.  
"Yeah but I almost ruined it twice!" PJ whined.  
Dan sighed and looked at him, "Look PJ, its fine. We honestly don't care. You were both going to find out anyway. If anything, Chris is the one we should mostly be pissed at."

They all looked over to Chris again. Chris was grinning, "Oh yeah, sorry about that."

Dan shrugged it off. Phil looked worried so Dan pulled him into a cuddle. Phil wrapped his arms around Dan's waist while Dan put his chin on top of Phil's head.

"Don't worry," Dan whispered, "It'll all be fine."  
"I should be comforting you, not the other way around," Phil remarked.  
"I don't care how I'm feeling. I want you to feel better."

Phil smiled against Dan's chest.

"I already do."

* * *

**I love the fact that when I read through it, I don't remember writing certain bits but they're awesome so I keep them haha. Anyway, I hope you like it. I just want to say that I am currently writing two other stories. They're the same story but in different POV. Phil's and Dan's. Phil's is called I Will Always Protect You. And Dan's is called I Will Always Look After You. I would appreciate it if you could check them out. Thank you :) **


	9. Chapter nine

**AN at the bottom.**

* * *

Chapter nine: First times, dinner and shirts.

It was time and Phil knew it. He looked in his mirror. He looked the same as usual. He straightened his hair even though he knew that it would soon be messy again. He was scared but excited at the same time.

Dan had been out all day and he was expected to be back at any minute. Even though Phil wanted him to be home already, he kind of hoped that he wouldn't be back for a while.

Phil looked down at his favourite black jeans and his blue shirt. He realised that these were the clothes he had worn when he and Dan had first gotten together. He smiled as he thought of that evening. But then he remembered Becca. His smile soon faded and he looked back at the mirror.

He had technically cheated on a gorgeous, amazing girl. He remembered what she had said when he had told her.

Her words that day had stung. He tried not to let his good mood and plans be shaken by this bad memory.

Dan unlocked and opened the door to his and Phil's flat. He walked up the stairs and at once knew that something was up.

Walking into the kitchen, Dan noticed that the table was all done up. It had a table cloth on and cutlery was all set up.

"Phil? What's going on?" He walked into the lounge. Phil wasn't in there.

Phil appeared in the doorway and smiled.

"Are we expecting the Queen or something? What's with all the fancy stuff?" Dan asked.  
"A table cloth isn't that fancy."  
"It is to me," Dan smiled.

Phil shook his head and pulled Dan into a hug.

"What's this all for anyway?" Dan questioned.  
"Can't a man cook dinner for his boyfriend anymore?" Phil smiled.  
"I suppose." Dan knew that Phil was up to something.

"I'll err… I'll go get changed then," Said Dan, eying up Phil's fancy get up.

Phil smiled and watched Dan leave the room.

Taking a deep breath in, he checked the dinner. It was nearly ready.

Dan looked through his wardrobe. What was Phil planning?

Pulling on his black jeans and a white shirt, Dan ran through the possibilities in his head. Nothing came to mind.  
He decided to just go with it and went back into the kitchen.

Phil was plating up the food.

"Is there anywhere in particular you want me to sit?" Dan grinned.  
"No, you can sit on either chairs."

Dan sat down on the nearest seat.  
Phil put a plate of food in front of him before getting his own.  
The dinner did look good.

Dan waited until Phil was seated to actually eat.  
Phil watched as Dan tucked in.

"I'm starving," Dan grinned.  
"Good. I was scared that I was going to burn something."  
"No, it's tasty!" Dan shoved a mouthful of chicken into his mouth.  
"Makes a change from Chinese food," Phil smirked.  
"It sure does. I haven't had a proper meal like this since I visited my parents last month."

They carried on with the small talk until they had both finished.

Phil cleared away the plates before sitting back down next to his boyfriend.

"So… are you going to tell me what this is really about then?" Dan raised an eyebrow.

Phil blushed and looked down, smiling.

"Come on Philip, you've made me wait long enough."  
"Exactly," Phil looked up, "You don't have to wait anymore."

Dan frowned, clearly confused.

Phil decided to stop talking and leant in.  
Dan closed his eyes as Phil kissed him.

After a minute Phil pulled away.  
He looked Dan in the eyes and whispered, "I'm ready."  
Dan smiled. He had had a hunch that this was what it was all about.  
"Are you sure?" He asked.  
Phil smiled and nodded.

Dan stared into Phil's beautiful, deep blue eyes. He leaned in and kissed him.

They continued to kiss over the table for a few more minutes until Dan pulled away and said, "Come one."  
He stood up and pulled Phil up after him.

Holding Phil's hand, Dan dragged him into the hallway.

"My bedroom or yours'?" Dan asked.  
"Um I don't mind."  
"Let's go in mine," Dan smiled, pulling Phil through the doorway.

Phil knew that Dan was eager so he didn't say anything until Dan started unbuttoning his shirt.

"Dan," Phil put his hands over Dan's.  
Dan stopped and looked up at him.  
"We have all night. Stop rushing."  
Dan nodded and redid his buttons up.

"Sorry," He blushed.  
"Its fine," Phil smiled.

Dan sat on his bed and rubbed his eyes.

Phil didn't quite know what to say so just sat down next to him and put his arm around his shoulders.

"I know I'm rushing," Dan looked at him, "It's only because I want you to bad. It's not just the thought of sex. Even though I haven't exactly got any for a while now." He smiled, "I just want you Phil. I want to be as close to you as possible."

Phil smiled and rested his forehead against Dan's.

"You're sweet Dan," Phil whispered.  
"And you're cute," Dan grinned.

Dan moved so he was facing Phil. He curled his arms around Phil's waist and pulled him closer.

Phil smiled and draped his arms around Dan's shoulders.  
He knew that Dan was taking the more masculine role but he didn't mind.

They both leant in and brushed their lips against each other's.

Phil breathed in Dan's scent. He smelt vaguely of deodorant and aftershave, but mainly of Dan. Phil loved Dan's natural scent.

Dan slipped his tongue into Phil's mouth.  
Phil was a bit surprised at first but soon got back into the rhythm.

Their lips moved in synchronisation.

The only thing that came to Dan's mind was the fact that they could have gotten together sooner. Why did it take so long for him to realise his feelings towards Phil? He was annoyed with himself for being so oblivious. They were _his_ feelings. How had he not noticed them?

That didn't matter now though. He was with Phil. He didn't need to dwell on this.

Pushing those thoughts into the back of his head, Dan pulled Phil closer still.

Dan's hands started dancing down Phil's back, making his spine tingle.

Phil smiled against Dan's lips. This was the longest they had ever kissed in one sitting.

They finally pulled away, gasping for breath. Dan rested his forehead against Phil's.  
"Phil," He gasped.  
"Dan," Phil replied.

They didn't say anything else, they spoke without words.

Dan looked at Phil's blue shirt and started to undo the buttons.  
Phil knew what was happening. He was nervous but ready.

When Dan had undone all of the buttons he slowly pulled off the shirt.  
Phil felt bare without his top on but that didn't stop him from taking off Dan's.

Dan watched as Phil worked on his shirt. Phil was beautiful. His chest. It was beautiful. Sure Dan had seen it before but not like this.

Soon they were both topless and kissing passionately.

Dan's hands started to explore Phil's chest. He felt his heart. It was beating fast.  
Dan pulled away to comment, "Do I always make your heart beat this fast?"  
"It's always like this whenever I see you or hear your voice."

Dan couldn't help but smile. He didn't say anything, he just held Phil's hand and put it against his own chest.  
"Feel that?" He asked.  
Phil nodded.  
"You make my heart go mad. Whenever you're not around I feel like I don't have one but when you're here… When you're here it comes back to life because Phil… You're my everything. Without you I'd be nothing."

Phil didn't know what to say. That was one of the sweetest things that Dan had ever said to him.  
He smiled and said, "Dan… Why are you so sweet?"  
"And why are you so fucking adorable?"  
Phil blushed, "I'm really not."

Dan shook his head, determined to win this argument, "Phil. You are the cutest thing ever, okay? You are my adorable Philip. Believe me, you are the cutest person I have ever met. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Even yourself."

Phil nodded and smiled. Dan was far too good for him.

After all the mushy stuff, Dan decided to stop telling Phil his feelings and actually show him.  
He moved his hand down to Phil's jeans. Before he did anything he looked Phil in the eyes and asked, "Phil, are you sure you're ready? I don't want to rush you."  
"I'm ready," Phil smiled. He moved in for another kiss.

The night passed with pure bliss and ecstasy. By the end of it all, they were both out of breath.

They lay side by side, holding hands.

"Wow." Was all that Dan could muster.

Phil didn't say anything. He was grinning like a Cheshire cat.  
Dan turned his head and looked at him. "You were definitely worth the wait," He grinned.  
Phil looked back at him, "So were you." He blushed just thinking about it.  
This made Dan smile. He pulled Phil closer and put an arm around him.

Phil cuddled up next to Dan. He was exhausted now. He was about to drift off when Dan said, "Phil?"  
"Mmm?"  
"I love you."  
"I love you too Dan. I always have."  
"And I always will."

* * *

**Guys, I am so fucking sorry! I hadn't realised that it was so long since I last uploaded a chapter. I have a goodish reason though. I'm moving around my ships. If you have more than one OTP like me you'll understand. You can't just stick to one of your pairs for a whole month. You can't help but change who you fangirl over. The only reason I haven't updated for ages is because I haven't written anything. I haven't written anything to do with Phan since I uploaded the last chapter. I lost all my Phan feels for the month and moved onto Frerard (Frank Iero and Gerard Way) who are my other OTP. I know its ONE true pair but I have two so screw the rules! My feels change constantly. I go to bed with Phan in my head and wake up crying about Frerard. Yes, I'm that sad. So I am really sorry! I just can't write anything to do with Phan when I have Frerard in my head. The story would turn out crap! Well, I'm back in Phan mode now so expect a few more chapters soon for this story and my other two.  
I did write a few things to do with Frerard but I don't want to start writing about them properly until I've sorted out all of my Phan stories. I love Phan too, so sorry Frerard! Anyway, thanks for waiting. I'll try not to do this again :P **

**Beth**


	10. Chapter ten

Chapter ten: November, December and jumps in time.

Dan's eyes slowly opened. He blinked a few times as they adjusted to the light. As he recalled the previous night's events, he smiled.

Looking down, his smile grew wider.  
Phil was sleeping soundly in his arms. He looked so peaceful.

Dan started stroking his face. He still couldn't get over the fact that this beautiful man was his.

He leaned down and kissed Phil on the forehead.  
Phil smiled and opened his eyes. He looked up at Dan who was grinning down at him.

"Good morning," Dan chirped.  
"Morning," Phil smiled sheepishly.  
"Sleep okay?" Dan asked.  
"Yeah, really well. Did you?"  
"Best sleep I've had in ages," Dan smiled in contentment.

Phil couldn't stop himself from smiling. He didn't think being this happy was possible.

"I could get used to this," Dan said suddenly, leaning his head back.  
"To what?" Phil frowned, moving so he could see Dan better.  
"I could get used to waking up to your face."  
"Is that a good thing then?" Phil smirked.  
Dan looked at him, "Definitely!"

Phil laughed and nuzzled up next to Dan.

* * *

"So… Last night was fun," Dan came into the kitchen.

Phil was pouring himself a bowl of cereal.

"Yeah… it was," Phil smiled to himself as he remembered last night.

"More than fun," Dan wrapped his arms around Phil's waist.  
Phil leant his head back against Dan's shoulder.

"It was perfect." Phil closed his eyes.  
"It really was," Dan grinned, "Told you it would be perfect."

Phil opened his eyes and turned so he could see Dan.

"Didn't I tell you?" Dan smirked.  
"Yeah, you did," Phil smiled.

* * *

"Have you talked to your mum yet?" Phil asked the next evening.  
"You mean since Chris let slip that I was snogging someone? No, not yet."  
"That was last week though. Hasn't she phoned?"  
"Of course. I just chose not to answer," Dan shrugged.  
"Dan! She's probably worried about you!"

Dan shrugged again, "Let her worry."

Phil frowned. Why was Dan behaving like this?

"What's gotten into you?" He asked.

Dan finally looked at him. He sighed and said, "Well, to be honest, I don't want to lie to her. No matter how the conversation goes, I'll end up lying to her. There's no way to avoid it. Saying I'm not seeing someone is lying but if I do say I'm seeing someone I'll have to lie about who it is. I can't exactly say, 'Yeah I'm in love with my best friend and roommate. We're currently dating and have just started to sleep together too. Oh did I forget to mention? I'm gay by the way.' Yeah, that'll go great." The sarcasm dripped heavily off of his tongue.

Phil had blushed a little throughout this but managed to collect himself and said, "I know you don't want to lie to her but it seems like your only option at the moment. Anyway, you lie all the time. Why is it bothering you now?"

"I don't lie all the time…" Dan smirked.  
"Sure you don't," Phil grinned, "Answer my question."

Dan thought for a minute before saying, "Well, I kind of _do_ want to tell her about us but… I don't? I'm not sure."

Phil nodded but kept quiet so Dan continued, "I want to tell the whole world because, Phil," He looked him in the eyes, "I'm really happy. I swear I've never been this happy in my life. I want to yell at the top of my lungs that I'm in love with Phil Lester! I know it sounds cheesy as shit but that's how I feel.  
I want to yell and scream and laugh but I can't. I don't want anyone to hear. It's not because I'm ashamed of being with you or that I'm gay. I'm just not ready for people to know."

During Dan's little speech, Phil had stared into his boyfriend's eyes.

After Dan finished, he dropped his head and looked at his feet.

"I feel exactly the same way!" Phil smiled, "I want to tell people but I don't want them to know. I'm stuck in this dilemma: I don't want to be judged but I really want everyone to know because, Dan," He waited until Dan looked up at him. When he did, Phil said, "I'm the happiest I've been too and I really, really love you."

Dan grabbed Phil into a hug and before pulling away he leant in again and kissed him.

The kiss was short and sweet and contained all the love they felt for each other.

"Are you going to phone your mum then?" Phil asked after they pulled apart.  
"Yeah, I guess I should," Dan replied.

* * *

"Oh my fucking God you're adorable!"

Phil frowned as he came in.

"You seriously are, Philip," Dan smiled.

Phil smirked. He was wearing a big jumper, his hair was messy and he was wearing his glasses.

"You need to wear your glasses more often."  
"No I don't. I just couldn't be bothered to put in my contacts today."  
"Well, don't be bothered every day," Dan winked, "Anyway, come here."

Dan held out his arms.  
Phil walked over to him.  
Dan pulled Phil down on top of him.

"Dan!" Phil squealed, not expecting it.

Dan made sure Phil was sitting on his lap properly and started to stroke his hair.

Phil sighed contently and rested his head on Dan's shoulder.

"I should be packing," Phil said.  
"Oh well," Dan smiled.  
"I seriously should. I am going _tomorrow_ after all."  
"Do you have to go?" Dan frowned.  
"Kind of. It's my dad's birthday," Phil replied.  
"I don't want you to go though…" Dan looked down.  
"I would say come with me but I don't think that's an option. My mum's planned everything. She would kill me if I did anything to affect the plans in anyway."

Dan just nodded, still looking down.

"Dan?"

Dan looked up.

"I'm going to miss you. Even though it's only a couple of days. I'll miss you," Phil smiled.  
"I'll miss you too, Philip."

Dan leaned in kissed Phil.

* * *

Phil had only been gone for two hours but Dan was already missing him like mad.

Well he _had_ been asleep for one and a half of those hours.

And for twenty minutes he just lay in bed, playing a game on his phone.

So he only remembered Phil had gone about five minutes ago.

Dan was a bit annoyed that Phil had snuck out without saying goodbye but then again he probably wouldn't have realised what was happening because he would have been half asleep.

After finally getting dressed, Dan padded through to the kitchen.

It was nearly ten. Phil would almost be there.

Dan was already starting to feel lonely.

Phil would be gone for three days.  
Dan wasn't sure if he could survive that long without him.

He pulled out his phone about thought about who to call. He was bored and wanted to talk to someone.

PJ? Chris? He decided to call them both.

After inviting them both over, he took a swig of orange juice.

It was now ten past ten. He knew Phil had probably just arrived and was being greeted by his family, but Dan needed to hear his voice.

He pulled out his phone again and went into "Contacts". Going down to "P", he found Phil's name and pressed "Call".

It rung four times before Dan heard, "Hello? Dan?"  
"Hey," Dan smiled.

"Sorry I didn't answer straight away, I was going up the stairs."  
"That's okay," Dan sat down at the kitchen table.

"You get there okay?" He asked.  
"Yeah. I arrived about fifteen minutes ago. The train arrived early."  
"Cool." Dan wasn't sure what to say.

"Is there a reason you called me?" Phil questioned.  
"Of course! I didn't call for no reason…"  
"What's the reason then?" Dan could hear the smirk in Phil's voice.

"Um… I uh, I miss you." Dan mentally facepalmed. He sounded like an idiot.

Phil obviously didn't think so though.

"Aww! I miss you too. You have no idea how much I want to be in your arms right now," He said.

Dan grinned and said, "You have no idea how much I want to kiss you right now."

He heard Phil's laughter down the line.

"I have to go Dan. I love you. I'll call you later, okay?"

Dan's face fell a little but he said, "Okay. I love you. Bye."

"Bye."

The line went dead.

Dan ended the call and put his phone on the table.

Fuck he missed Phil!

* * *

"He hasn't even been gone a day," PJ raised an eyebrow.  
"I know! I have to endure three more days of this!" Dan moaned.

"You're ridiculous!" Chris laughed, shaking his head.

"If it's ridiculous to miss your boyfriend, then fine, I'm fucking ridiculous!" Dan spat.

"No need for that," PJ said.

Dan shrugged and pulled his legs up to his chest.

"Well, I'm not sure if we can help you," Chris said.  
PJ nodded in agreement.

Dan sighed heavily and dropped his legs.

"Come on! It isn't that bad," PJ tried to reassure him.

"It's not bad at all!" Chris laughed, "You have the flat to yourself for three days. You could do anything!"

"But what I _want_ to do is talk to Phil! I want to cuddle him. I want to kiss him. But I can't because he's not here!" Dan whined.

"You guys have spent time apart before. What makes this time any different?" PJ frowned.  
"I wasn't in love with him then," Dan replied.

"Are you sure about that?"

Dan and PJ turned to look at Chris with confused looks on their faces.

"What I mean is," Chris started, a smile appearing on his face, "Are you sure it's only recently that you've loved him? Maybe you have for a long time and only just realised it."

PJ looked at Dan. "He has a point," He said.

Dan thought for a moment. He looked from PJ to Chris.

"I'm not sure…" He finally said.

"I knew I was right!" Chris grinned.

Dan rolled his eyes and said, "It doesn't matter anyway. I don't want to think about the past anymore. I want to focus on the present with Phil and hopefully the future with him too."'

* * *

AN:

Fucking hell this chapter was cheesy!

Yeah so this chapter is a bit all over the place. There a few jumps in time. The reason for this is because I haven't written anything for so long so I'm trying to rush through.

Yeah I haven't updated in a while. I just haven't been in the mood. Sorry. That's my reason why I haven't updated in a while. I'm not making up a load of shit about why I've been a bit MIA the last few months. I just haven't been in the mood. 2013 was a hard year for me.

Okay so I have no idea when Phil's dad's birthday is so for the purposes of this story it's in November.

Oh and also in this chapter it's November-December 2013.

I'm a bit behind hehe.

I want to quickly update what I need to before Phil's birthday.

Phil's birthday…

He's going to be twenty fucking seven!

WTF?! That can't happen!

Someone please kill me.

-Beth xoxo


End file.
